I think about you constantly, whether it's with my mind or my heart. ~ Albany Bach Reid

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

When silence is eloquent

Because I heard someone once said if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all!

Ok, so blame it on a good Malay upbringing. Or blame it on me just being me. I always say what people want to hear. I do not want to disappoint people. I may damn well make myself miserable, but always at the expense of someone else's feelings.

Sometimes certain people can't understand why I'd rather be unheard and thought well of. I always do what's expected like a genteel lady, put a smile on my face and gracious words no matter what.

Really. It's all about giving the impression of complete control of self and situation. No big deal.

I'm not making any sense, am I? Thing is, it's close to midnight already and I can’t seem to close my eyes even though I am unbearably worn-out. An aftermath of way too many hours spent on the road since last Friday. A cool get-away tho.



Here's the thing. Twice this month I became spellbound and miraculously stood still after a confession of an unsuppressed mind. It happened again. And this time on 23rd of December 2008. Just hours ago. Gees. I was having this conflict within myself trying to come up with words. I mean come on! Am such a scoundrel when it comes to back-to-back yak but why oh why all of a sudden, that very moment I became speechless?

Tell me, if you have nothing to say but you know you should say something, what do you say?

I hereby, cringely declare that now I am putting my special thinking cap on.

4 comments:

intoxicated_lover said...

"if you have nothing to say but you know you should say something, what do you say"?

I'd say, "Ntah" until it infuriates the other person.

ha. ha.

heliocentrism said...

Help me Cyeda. I am so don't knoe what to do. It's like, maybe it seems like it's better to leave things unspoken but that maybe just me. O boy..

Anonymous said...

Dear Suria...

One thing I've learned after my age is catching up on me is, say what ever you want to say even it hurts both of us. There's no point of taking care of each other feelings if what we want to express meant something good. Nevertheless, if it's bad, then you have to embrace it even it cut deep inside..Life is cruel dear.

heliocentrism said...

Dear Azah,

Words of wisdom again from you. Thing is, I just realize that one of the reasons why I became dumbfounded, saying nothing as if a cat's got my tongue is that; I have no idea what I feel or I do not feel inside.

Life's indeed complicated and when it involves rather knotty mushy feelings, it gets worse.