I think about you constantly, whether it's with my mind or my heart. ~ Albany Bach Reid

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

There's always tomorrow

The moment of peace after waking up lasts all but ten minutes. Yup, that 'long'. As I go into the bathroom, I feel yesterday's blues reassert themselves in my forehead.

Still, there's no desperate rush this morning. I have time to catch the usual yaks of MHI for a while but at nine o'clock I'm obliged to log on to the computer and start my work. I tell myself that I will not let myself feel rushed. I'll maintain a Zen-like calm, taking moments out of the day to center myself. I will go for breakfast, and not allow myself to get flustered and irritable, unlike yesterday. Geez, yesterday was a catastrophe. Let’s not go into that.

For days now, I've been meaning to set aside time for figuring out a new, cooler way to live. To foster practices that will not let my mood be assaulted by the demands of the day, loads of paperwork, or my own drive to get as much done as I can.

I hope to do that today, but, by twelve thirty I realize that I'm exactly where I don't want to be. I'm constantly pushing myself to work on the scripts marking, I'm anxious and dejected, and I haven't gotten as far in my work as I need to (the shifting deadline is currently set for Friday..yikes!!)

How am I supposed to fit everything else in today, in addition to work: going for that marking, working on my assignments, taking time out to figure out how to be? By five thirty, however, I stop working, turn off the computer and hit the road. Earlier I escaped, during the day, to a cafe with thoughts on catching up with Dr. Hanim's assigned articles, half an hour from the university. I need to get out of the office sometimes to keep my sanity.

But it's too late, now, to do everything I wanted to do, since I'll be going out with the crew not long after Maghrib prayer. Still, I could make a start. But wait, I need to put this down for awhile. Am so in the mood to get this off my chest. There's always something that needs doing today.

And, there's always tomorrow ...err. Right? (boy am I in trouble)

Monday, April 12, 2010


I promised myself before that I won't make this blog as a platform for a total expression of feelings. Instead, I've turned it to a personal rack of collection of songs that I currently listen to. Which I think some how reflects a certain degree of emotional shout outs.

Things are going smoothly lately, for those who are wondering (and no, am still keeping and running Of Mas Tulen and Honey ). Things are good. And most of them are created out of changes and adjustment. 'Cos that's what we do as humans. We adapt to changes and adjustments.

I've missed out some things. At the same time, I am missing some things as well. Such a shame.

Aaanyways. I first heard this song while I was on my usual route coming home from work in Dungun. Of late, I rarely have my radio blasted on like I used to, and then that one particular day, my finger pushed the radio button on and there you might have guessed it, this song was aired. And I was stuck. Up until this very moment. Tomorrow is a different story.

Have a go at it (if you haven't, I mean). I won't babble about how this song affects me in some ways or anything.